Last Tuesday, my husband told me he was tired of the Colorado cold and wanted to fly to Florida as soon as possible.
Sure, I thought, don’t we all. But he was serious.
We spent the whole next day debating if such a last-minute trip was a brilliant or terrible idea.
At 4pm Wednesday, we bought tickets for a 9am flight the following day. We planned, booked, and packed for a 1-week trip with little kids in a few hours.
Well, even after two long days at Disney, a 7-hour road trip up the coast, sleeping in multiple places, and waiting in the airport at 1 in the morning with tired kiddos, it turned out to be a brilliant idea.
When I say brilliant, I don’t mean it wasn’t hard. It was a roller coaster of emotions with low lows and high highs.
But the whole experience got me thinking. . .
Remember. . .
Fun, wonder, and delight. . . you need it
I think I need reminders that I’m alive.
Obviously, I know I’m alive, but what I mean is that it’s really easy to lose sight of how incredible it is that I’m alive, to forget that I am the architect of the meaning of my life and that it’s possible to have a lot of fun and enjoy myself while I’m here.
It’s easy to get caught up in life and blinded to the wonder that’s around.
Our capacity for wonder and delight is the gateway to our joy.
I realized the importance of shifting my attention away from the noise, the distractions, the chaotic thoughts. . . and coming back to the moment. To what is here, right now, to delight and appreciate.
Savor the toddler laughs, stare up at the stars in wonder, take a walk and admire the stunning beauty of trees, eat dark chocolate as slow as you can, go on a last-minute adventure, jump in a lake -
do whatever you can to shake yourself awake, out of the daily grind, and in a new state of mind.
The joy, healing, and creativity that open up when you are in a state of awe and wonder is miraculous, yet I still forget. It sounds dumb to remind yourself to find delight, but if you're not doing it, I’d write yourself a note to start;)
Tell your heart that the fear of suffering is worse than the suffering itself
People always tell me they could never survive if they lost a child. I get it, I would have said the same thing. But something happens when you actually experience your worst fear. It’s not that it isn’t horrible, you just figure it out, supernatural grace gets granted to you that you didn’t have before, and people come to support you.
Whatever you are most worried about happening, even if it happened, you will probably feel different about it than you thought you would so worrying about it now is wasting your precious life. The ancitipation of something bad happening is worse then when it actually happens.
Your brain is often wired to discount the present and start worrying about what will happen next. So you need to intentionally be aware of when you are worrying about the next thing, and alchemize that thought into another.
From worrying about death to worrying about how your kids will do on a 7-hour car ride, it’s a practice to let it go and return to the moment you are in, knowing whatever happens, you’ll deal with it then.
Life is the practice
Speaking of practice, it’s all practice. All of it. Staying grounded is a practice. Learning to tune into what you need and finding the capacity to actually meet that need is a practice.
Spirituality and ordinary life are not separate. Our work is to bring depth and presence to everyday moments.
Towards the end of our trip, I began to see it as a practice. . . the 7-hour road trip, the 7 hours on a plane, the delayed flight, the waiting for car seats at the airport in the middle of the night. . . all with little children with big emotions.
I am not naturally a resilient person, so I’ve been trying to intentionally put myself in challenging situations and practice staying calm and grounded in them.
I think we are tested and therefore built in the challenge. All the ‘work’ and knowledge in the world doesn’t mean anything if you don’t apply it when it matters, when it’s the hardest. It’s been fun to use my everyday life as a practice or a game to build the qualities I want most.
Sometimes I win, and many times I lose, but I know maturity is not expecting things to be easy or yourself to be perfect, but to practice jumping back on the horse faster and smoother each time you get knocked off and start living in ways you don’t like, so the emotions that used to take you out for days only last hours. Not judging yourself for getting knocked off (because you know it will happen), but getting over yourself enough to start again. . . and again.
If anything has been helpful to you, I would be so grateful if you could share this post/newsletter with someone you think would benefit from it <3
What a wonderful gift to jump on your husbands adventure with him!
That looks just like Siesta Beach Sand! Glad you enjoyed our Florida Paradise.